yesterday i finished school earlier and went to see MAMA! with mom and dad. she amazes us all. when we got there she was sleeping like a baby in her fetal position, then she woke up and started talking and talking and talking. she was put in the high dependency ward because she was breathless for some reason. the ward is sweet, BUT there're no chairs or anything accommodating to the visitors BECAUSE they don't want you to stay long in there lah. pfft. fed mama the porridge we brought and she ate that instead of her provided dinner. she couldn't even be bothered to let us feed her, just helped herself. she must miss home food. after that we just spent some time with her, laughed with her, wondered at how she does this time and again.

gran's stable now, and totally unlike her horrible state on friday and saturday. her arm is nice and flat now, no more inflammed scary mass there, but her arm is a little swollen with water. she still has to use the tube in her neck for dialysis. the docs changed her drip thing to her ankle cause her hand one was quite inflammed. :O she is eating well and talking like usual. miraculous lah, thank you God!

of course, pics for you! i must say, gran is queen of funny faces.

*yes, porridge jjang!*

*mmmm, thank you for praying for me! don't i look cute now?*
aegyo~ omo, kiyowoh!
i mean, might as well right? :P
praying together before we go. mommy prays then mama mumbles things she wants to add, like help her to not feel chuan, help her to poop, etc.

when you see her before and after, you realize for yourself that life and death really are in God's hands.

gran got through the surgery nice and steady! man, she's one fighting mama. i am actually very surprised. i guess God has more plans for her for now. :)

she and my parents waited from 2+, after her dialysis, until like 9 this morning before she could actually have the surgery done. daddy was updating me while i was at church. i was a little nervous about the outcome, but i wasn't emo or anything lah. haha. it was really really nice of everyone to show concern in their own ways. support does help.

parents have gone to lala land. :) they seem alright. it's sweet to see them stick together in times like these. was talking to my mom last night,
M: i'm okay. daddy's with me.
A: yah yah, just don fight can already.
M: now he starting to fight with me already. HAHA~
D: *mumbling in the background*
M: i tell him to get cold water he go and get hot water.
A: and now he's insisting he's right?
M: yalah.
A: HAHAHAHA.
M: i told him to go watch TV
A: hahahahahaha.

so sweet lah i tell you. it's nice to have someone you can lean on. :) *song comes to mind?* keke.
timmy bought us pizza today. i wish i had more working brothers, boy would life be good. XD

thank God for carrying us through, without much turmoil or trauma, other than on mama's part that is. he really gave us the calm and strength we needed, and he's letting us have mama for a while more. ^^

came back about half an hour ago from SGH. thanks to BJ who made a trip there to support support. we caught a ride from him, we being tim and me. brought some stuff for mom and dad, just toiletries for tomorrow morning.

saw gran and she looks horrible. her fever has subsided, i think she still looks so sick! she was at dialysis when we saw her, shivering and drowsy and not able to talk. but she recognized us and tried to smile and stuff. anyway, she should be in for the big op at 2+. it's big because of the anesthesia, complex stuff. gave mom and dad big hugs before leaving and told them to tell me if the slightest thing happened. BJ and S.lydia passed them a Bible too. thank you so much BJ and S.lydia, for the love and support. everyone else too.

i can't help but think it's cute that daddy was gonna cry so many times. i myself was taking deep breaths to handle all those sad scenes and i was thinking to myself, no daddy don't cry ah! you cry i won't be able to hold it in already! HAHA. my daddy has a very tender heart although he looks tough, but hey, who won't feel heartwrenched when it comes to our moms? especially this mama of ours. :) anyway some of you are asking how am i? i think i'm alright. hoping for the best, preparing for the worst. yes, easier said than done, but i'm trying. must be strong strong girl, strong with trust in God.

just called mommy and she told me more clearly what's going on over there. gran had some tube inserted down her neck already. that is the first thing on the 'list'. i think the tube's for her dialysis. now she's waiting for dialysis, which would take about 3 hours. after dialysis is done she'll go for the big op for her arm, to remove the shant (spelling?) and stuff. mom says thank God that the antibiotics are working so her fever's gone down, and the pain is manageable now. so that's that.

was talking to mommy, trying to find the useful questions to ask so i don't waste her brain energy on stupid things. she said, "sitting beside mama now..." wah, i heartpain when i heard that lah for some reason, maybe because i was picturing it. then i asked about the pain and she said, "... thank God the pain is tolerable now, she's just silently groaning." then i laughed, "silently groaning?" haha. i could tell mom was real tired. please pray for my parents too.

correction! gran's infected part of arm did not burst, i think it just got worse. uncle gave some wrong info. got a call from mommy during choir. asked her if i should go over to the hospital but she wanted me to come home. gran's gone for surgery, heard it'll be a whole night thing, so my parents will stay there indefinitely. they want us to stay home tonight and go to church tomorrow.

i don't know if it's very serious or not, but i know gran's too old for surgeries. mommy also said grans whole hand was bandaged and she was in alot of pain, which totally put a knife in my heart. i think i am scared and worried, yes that's what i'm feeling now. oh, and i'm sorry i didn't tell some of you earlier at choir. was afraid i'd start my waterworks if i tried to say it out, haha. so i just msged geil, but apparently it didn't get through, thus the late news.

please pray that gran will have less pain, and that she will be sure that she's God's child.
i love mama. =)

the weather was quite cool last night, but it was all ruined by some irritating MOZZIES! i was being bitten all over while i slept and woke up because it was so itchyyyyyy. AAAAAAH ! my legs, back, fingers. tonight i'm gonna fumigate my room ah i tell you. tsk.

going for teens club later. i'm kinda sleepy and very hungry.

MY DOG IS SO CUTE. sometimes i really can't stand his adorability and i feel like hugging him until his eyeballs pop out.
UMM, that sounded sadistic. what i mean is I LOVE MY DOG.

his eyeballs are unbelievable. he can challenge those chameleons.

CUUTE RIIGHT?! bran endorses nike. ;))

DOOLY FACE! doo-ly~

Vois sur ton Chemin

Vois sur ton chemin
Gamins oubliés égarés
Donne-leur la main
Pour les mener
Vers d'autres lendemains

Sens au cœur de la nuit
L'onde d'espoir
Ardeur de la vie
Sentier de gloire

Bonheurs enfantins
Trop vite oubliés effacés
Une lumière dorée brille sans fin
Tout au bout du chemin

Sens au cœur de la nuit
L'onde d'espoir
Ardeur de la vie
Sentier de gloire

looking forward to vienna boys' choir now. whopee~

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO RAYE.

i feel bad that i thought her birthday was tomorrow. aw~

(agnes singing) THANK GOD FOR THE RAINNNNN~ i like i like.
and i mean the actual rain, not mr. rain.

the songs from Les Choristes are in my head! i'm sorta learning to sing some. (HEH!) i wish my parents stuck me in a choir when i was younger. singing kids are so cute. oh yes, did i mention? i have an ULCER in my throat. mom says for some reason i'm very prone to that. trying to keep it under control else my throat becomes a pus farm again, bad memories. it's not a very big ulcer but it hurts. still, i'm singing those frenchie songs inspite. haha, i think my family is irked out by my voice floating around the house all day, like a ghost's. sorry lah, abit out of tune. :D

fighting!

got fedup with matching clothes this morning so i just threw on a dress. i think i'm wearing all my dresses too often. they're so convenient lah! (and airy. ehh ;))

today the passage for SBH was 1 corinthians 9-10. i tried my best to pay attention, daydreamed a little in the middle. (i'm sorrry.) then it was aunty janet's and my turn to teach chapel. was genuinely feeling nervous before that. i'm always afraid i'll like, say something wrong and ruin a child's life forever or something ridiculous like that. i think i did alright, thank God. :D the kids are sweet when they're not fighting.

napped for a while when i came back, but woke up because i was SWEATING. then accompanied mommy down for a stroll to guardian and watsons, etc. i bought a pretty notebook since the old one ran out of pages.

i'm so sleepy now.

woke up the latest i could today, cause i was so SO sleepy! i still am now, in fact. went down to dabao food. i would have skipped breakfast if i could, but my appetite's ridiculous nowadays. i used to think i was one of those blessed ones who ate tons of junk and never grew an inch, but i'm beginning to see that i'm not. there's REAL FAT layering on my body, in bad places. so anyway, i was starving when i woke up and i went down to get some food and bubble tea. (cravings. tsk tsk.) half way buying, the van came to pick me up for teens club. and off i went.

after teens, had lunch at SUPER-BORING SUN PLAZA. sorry lah guys, i sorta decided on the place right? i just needed ACon. :D seriously the heat's killing me these days. edward joined us, and i tell you he's super talkative and has that sec-1 humor. HAH, it's nice having him around. join us every week ah, ed. then we shall eat in sembawang for ever. ;))

choir was alright. i had good voice in the beginning but it wore off quickly. i really regret not taking more care of my voice when i was younger. i sorta wrecked my throat. so sad. now i can't reach those high notes like i used to! i'm in a julie andrews mood thinking about it...

finishing up an order of cards that i've delayed for so long. hope to deliver them via timlow-mail tomorrow. OH yah, i'm teaching chapel tomorrow too! i still get jittery okay.

fighting~

IT

IS

SO

HOT

TODAY

... and yesterday too. man, not nice leh. that, coupled with nasty hormones, is making my face turn into a zit farm again! ARRG. angry red volcanoes (AHA, exaggeration) popping out. yes, people who meet me.. you will see. =(

mommy was given MC for yesterday and today, so we went to see gran this morning. at first she seemed alright, but then she began puking and stuff, but at least her fever was down. we (mom, dad, me, aunt) left shortly after she went in for dialysis. after lunch mom and i went for a walk at AMK hub, and i was buying a present for tim when mommy got a call from the hospital saying that gran's arm-- the part used for dialysis-- was infected, causing her sky high fever attacks, and they couldn't go through with dialysis cause the infection could get into her bloodstream if they needle her. UM, anyway she's in SGH again. temporary ward 54D, room 11 bed 1. cut short our shopping trip and met up with daddy to go home. so, the granny episode is not over yet.

managed to get tim's birthday present. it's simple and he already has a lot of them, but it's nice. also bought a pair of heels, some jap brand, at a super slashed price. two of the four things i planned to buy. oh well. =)

aunt invited me to a PERANAKAN CONCERT, or play, or something like that. WHOO~~ i was saying, too bad i don't have my own suit of baju kebaya. =(

really appreciate those people who visited gran on sunday, that was very thoughtful of you all! gran's fever went up and down. we got to see that when dad, mom and i went to see her yesterday. one moment she's curled up and shivering, the next she can sit up and talk. it's scary, but thank God the fever's manageable. if it gets out of hand, meaning she doean't respond to the meds there in AMK, then she'll be sent to SGH-- again. she was happy to see people caring for her yesterday. (yes, she loves attention. but who in her shoes wouldn't?) i thought mommy was strong. when gran was really jiatlat and puking and shaking i was going to display some waterworks already, but mommy seemed fine. she just kept sponging her. :)

went home and waited for 10pm, when arts central was showing a movie i've been wanting to watch for AGES. i knew about it before, and the vocal teacher that taught our choir recommended it too. found out about the singer, jean-baptiste maunier, while searching youtube. anyway, the film is called les choristes and it's nice.

mommy at SGH getting her ear checked out now. may be a number of things, but we'll see. daddy's accompanying her.

today was an average saturday, teens-lunch-choir-home day. there's nothing much to tell..

just got news that gran is now running a HIGH fever, 39+, which probably feels more than horrible. please keep her in your prayers. heard something about low oxygen levels and stuff too. hope she will be fine. mama fighting~

brain tired now. goodnight people.

been thinking about december's church camp. seriously looking forward to it, cause i realized it'll be the only time in this entire year when i'll get to go overseas. does malaysia count as overseas? over a tiny sea. no travelling for me this year. um, sad. especially since year 16 is supposed to be exciting and fun and whatever else it's made up to be. but anyways, at least there's still church camp.

yesterday gran was running a fever. a day or two before that she told us she had problems breathing all of a sudden, but the docs said all seemed fine so they would just observe her. i hope nothing's wrong.

mom and dad went to the polyclinic on wednesday. mom has some deafness in her ear (!!!!) and dad needed to go for a blood test, liver stuff. age really is a bugger...

i'm SO SAD for bran! his entire upper row of teeth are shaky and one already dropped out, who knows when! it's really dawning (more like crashing) upon me that bran won't last forever, and that is such a depressing thought. he's only, what, 6? and he's becoming a boh gey, ah pek dog! *sniffs* age REALLY is a bugger. when bran dies, i don't think i'll be able to take it as containedly (i made that word up) as jake. i'll be crying all over the place.

took this at sheng siong. you should NEVER stack damage. it just comes back to you in the end!wanna remove your iris, lip, or eye?

KY learning to cycle from a person (me) who hardly knows how to cycle. gagaga~

sent bran to the groomers and he's BOTAK AGAIN!

prayer retreat was good! more tiring than i expected, but still good. the lessons were on faith, cause prayer requires faith. there was just a small group of us who stayed over.

waited for the van for quite some time at pasir ris mrt. ended up wandering around the mall abit before slumping down on some benches inside, tim, me and geil. van picked us up and we booked into the chalet, got settled into our rooms, had a short word time, then went to buy stuff for the stay. had dinner out and went back for another word time and prayer before going to bed. didn't exactly sleep well, but compared to the other campers i think we got the most sleep.

woke up at 6 the next day. i was bunking with tim. prayed after the message and had breakfast. then morning worship. then we prayed again? i can't remember. anyway it was free time all the way after that, so we went cycling. i accompanied KY since she and i couldn't really cycle, and she rented a bike to learn. (lol) went back to the bungalow a few hours later to bathe and eat dinner, then had evening worship and went to bed. tim went back home cause he was coming down with something. this time the rooms were taken by some families, so the girls bunked in the hall together.

started worship at the same time, 6:30, the next morning. all of us were seriously sleepy. had breakfast and packed up to go home. BJ sent us back.

the end! not exactly eventful or fun, but a good time to remember the importance of prayer. there're pics but they're not with me. i'll post them when i get them.

UMM, i'm going for the ABM retreat later! so i thought i'd blog a little before leaving my lovely computer for a few days.

thank God i did well for my maths test. and i completed the calligraphy work that i esteemed impossible yesterday! (almost broke my fingers trying to finish that. tsk.) may post up pics of my sweat and blood on the art blog.

gran has put on WEIGHT, like obviously. i guess that's a good thing. =)

been watching this kr show called infinity challenge (dramas are boring. variety shows are more worth the time!) and it's FUNNY. the show gets six 'misfits' to do tasks and missions, and the humor feeds off their quirks. :D yesterday i was watching an episode where they went to korea's english town where everyone is forced to speak whatever english you know, and it was hilarious, i was laughing out loud with my head phones on at my comp. parents walked pass my room shaking their heads and imitating me. HEH.

gonna pack for the retreat.

iknowiknow i'm so guilty of neglecting my blog. :( trying to get back to that daily-posting habit.

i'm really thinking about learning/studying korean. alright, i know everyone's like shaking their heads thinking i'm one of those korean-crazed aunties/teenagers that's swept away with the flow of the stupid kwave. i'm not ohkay! the kwave just introduced this culture to me and i now find it interesting, if may phrase it that way. X) no, i'm not like those obsessed fans who would go for fan meetings or autograph sessions or sleep on a pillow with rain's face on it or wear socks with pictures of BYJ printed on them, (the socks one is scary. like a hidden fetish. imagine a market aunty pulling off her shoe to reveal BYJ's face! ackk!) nor do i drown myself in the ringing soundtrack of the current in-drama. please don't ever picture me as any of the above, thank you very much.
back to the learning korean thing. anyone wanna learn too? it's nicer to have a buddy. the more the merrier. i think i'll have an easy time cause i've learned BY MYSELF how to read (muahaha. internet jjang!) and i realized it's 10 times easier than chinese and 100000 times easier than french. tell me if you wanna learn too! even if it's just for fun, like a one month thing. *teeth-smile*

oh yes, did i ever mention i quit greek? one year of insanity (french) is enough for me. i got stuck at the second volume of greek and seriously got mad, mostly at my tiny brain for spitting all i want to learn out. replaced it with some college old testament survey which supposedly gets more difficult towards the end of the course, but hey it's anytime closer to home for me than GREEK. a lesson for my future decision making: avoid mediterranean languages written in squiggly form. AHA, no lah, i learned not to overestimate myself. i thought after french nothing was impossible, but whatever, greek's worse.

i am not very smart. art's just my thing. my only thing! *cries*

maths test tomorrow. whaiting!

Good Rainy Afternoon, Everybody...
last week was a normal boring week so i didn't really bother to post anything. having a bad sore throat now (depressed) and my head feels oozy and my neck feels like it's been used as a punching bag. ah, the flu bug. to sum up the feeling, it's like i've been trampled over by alot of people.

yesterday ABM celebrated its 5th birthday! whoo~ was glad to see daphne and CY and so many people there. i actually was feeling kind of sick so that sorta blocked my gladness from showing on my face. sorry if i looked grumpy, didn't mean it. i wore my funny orange batik dress which made me look old, but i don't mind. :) took some pics while waiting to go home.

omo, sarang heh~

haha, geil's dad.

today some new teens came for teens club, which was very refreshing. thank God!

after teens club and choir i met mommy at yishun and went to see MAMA! (gran) she looks good. =) she ate her dinner well and we brought her down for a walk around the hospital. gave the cafeteria food a try (it's not bad!) and took pictures. she REALLY likes taking pictures, oddly. while we were snapping away isa came, to gran's delight. after some time we brought her back up to watch some TV, then we tucked her in at bed time. isa drove us back (thanks isa) and now i'm pretty tired. pics of the nonyas~

i was laughing so hard cause mommy was taking this photo and signaled with her hands -1,2, then mama shouted "CHEE!"

i think we look like monkeys.

brought gran down to the 'kopitiam' at GH. we asked her if she wanted something light. dessert? popiah? then suddenly she said, YONG TAO FU! wah. after she ate her diarrhea started again and she got really upset. before that she was in a jolly good mood. *hais..* today she's moved to AMK!

some pics of sher's sweet sixteenth. i wish i had eaten more..

what's up with my hair. why i always end up so un-glam one.

Tim, what's with the pose??

after trying to dunk her in so many times...

see i ready to push her in already!

HAHA i poured water on her head while she was posing, but the camera didn't catch it! wasted...

look at all those hands ready to embed her face into the cake. tsk tsk tsk.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
today:
pretty tired now, just came back from visiting gran. she was alright but got a little depressed because of her diarrhea. =( mommy changed her pampers 3 times!! it stank real bad. nurses are wonderwomen. changing pampers no joke one okay! oh, gran didn't get to move to AMK on friday cause her blood potassium level's too high so got risk of HEART ATTACK!~ but now it's normal so she's moving tomorrow. thank GOD.

yesterday:
was real depressed about my skin so mom brought me to the docs to get some real meds. i wanted some oral medication cause it's really strong and works quick, but the doc said my face isn't that bad and some topical antibiotic gels would do. at least the doc wasn't just interested in selling the most expensive stuff lah, caring doctor. he was so long winded explaining about all the different options. my acne is a hormonal thing so it flares up regularly, if you know what i mean. it's not that i'm unhygienic or anything, no okay! haha. anyway, gonna apply me meds religiously and hope for good results.
after going to the doctor in the morning i had breakfast with mommy, a rare event. she stuffed me with half-boiled eggs and bread. went to telipok for teens club, then went for choir.

the rainy weather, is awesome.

had some fun fun at sher's birthday celebration on sunday. it was raining and raining, and it was freezing at my place when i left the house, but thank God the rain stopped just for sher. the field at sembawang park wasn't even muddy or anything. went to print some photos for sher, then waited for pickup at the mrt station. met aunty joanna and her girls at the bus stop waiting there too. we didn't recognize each other at first, funny.
so anyway, we reached the park first and helped set up the grrand bbq area while uncle CJ and the boys went to bring MORE chairs and stuff and fetch MORE people. a while later everyone arrived and we went to play games. frisbee. again. sighs. and captain's ball. again too. double sighs. was hoping for some funny icebreakers or something, you know, the kind that make you laugh and laugh. (i doubt you are getting what i mean.) i was already really tired from the past days' lack of sleep so i just ran around wobbling, a bit like a drunk, screaming more than playing. when did i start to scream so much? i scream when i get the ball, i scream when someone else gets the ball, i scream when someone drops the ball. i apologize to everyone who has gone partially deaf because of me. sorry sorry.
after games we ate, after eating we tried to throw sher into the sea. (sea sounds more dramatic than water.) the people carrying her kept throwing her in legs first, so, shil peh. on our last try me and another girl were supposed to push her in baptismal style, on her shoulders, but that girl last minute no strength so i ended up falling into the water WITH sher. spent the night trying to dry off my shorts.
took lots of pics, then went home. reached back around 9. came home and K.O.-ed.

i think i have insomnia. have a harrrrd time falling asleep nowadays. =(

gran gonna move to AMK rehab center on friday. =)

just came back from hospital. yesterday and today dad and i went at around 5 (reach).

yesterday:
we brought chicken soup for gran. she asked for it. nothing herbal, just potatoes and stuff. she ate alot! later her porridge came for dinner, but she said she was too full. after a while she was curious and asked me to let her taste it, and she ended up eating it (just some, but still). haha, was glad she ate well. after a few minutes she was all chatty and jokey. i brought my sketch book and tried to draw her, just to cheer her up. took pictures and showed them to her. technology confounds her. wah, a few times i really was holding back my tears while i was watching her! i control okay. just, alot of thoughts passed by me, emo lar. i can usually take alot of sad things without shedding a tear, but when it comes to old people and children i have a soft spot. was blinking and blinking like crazy-spastic person. (lol). listened to her talk about all sorts of things.. mostly gossiping about other patients. (ha) thank God, she has nice neighbours. they like her so much cause she's "cute and quiet". isa came and brought the promised siew mai for gran. then mom and tim came after work. after some time isa went home and we had dinner. went back to the ward to tuck gran in and left after 8. snapshots yesterday:

yum yum. chicken soup 'jjang'! (best!)

milk before bed. :)

today:
daddy brought the potent pig's stomach soup that gran ordered yesterday. he dumped in lots of pepper but gran said it wasn't enough. (WAH..) we grabbed some chicken pies from cheers on the way to her block cause we were hungry. the popo beside gran recognizes us instantly now. when i walked into the ward she wanted to shout hello, but i put my finger to my mouth signaling for her to be quiet first. then i walked pass my gran with my head down. "EHH!!!" she screamed with her eyes wide open! so funny. me and the popo laughed at her. gran ate the WHOLE TUMBLER-THING of soup! all the ginko nuts and whatever. she happily rejected the porridge provided right after that. oh, she very funny lah. she took the french loaf my uncle bought for her and broke it up and mixed it in the soup, like western style. later she asked me, "eh. you got bring the thing to take picture?" HAHA, she acts shy but she loves taking pictures okay. took more pics of her and let her see them. " yeeee hiao ah loo~" she exclaimed. she continued chatting and telling funny stories (mostly made up lah), then i showed her some vids of bran, or van as she calls him. let her inspect my bag too.. when she saw my make up pouch she made a big fuss. THEN she got hold of my sunglasses. i wore them and she laughed and laughed, then she wanted to wear them! told her to pose for me and she said OKAY! HAHAHA~ after all that she was quite lifted in spirits, so, thank God. mom came after work again. after a while we went to eat, then tucked gran in and left at around 9. pics from today:

obsessed with my phone-cam. AH mama chantek!

ISABELLA!! she love yoo too!!

WAH mama cool ah! preety ah! ai yuuuuuu~

thanks to everyone who's come so far. she really wants to see people and feel loved and wanted. if you have time, feel very free to drop by! i think she's getting better fast, now with her usual resolve kicking back in. in the beginning of the week she was saying funny things like going back to heaven and stuff, but i think the visits put away those thoughts. maybe God gave me this funny face so i could make her happy! anyway, thanks to everyone who's been praying for her too! doesn't she look better? :)

i really hope she bounces back like she always has. mama fighting!

on saturday mom and tim and i went to the hospital. tim had some checkup to do for his eyes. family has history of glaucoma. the eye center is very near SGH so, i tagged along to go see her after the checkup. at the eye center we met up with our mom's colleague who used to work there. tim and i were joking away.. kids central was on and we were reminded of our pokemon days. suddenly this spinning pikachu came up on the screen sending me into a frenzy of laughter. tim was closing his eyes for the eyedrops to set in but he couldn't help opening them after hearing my gagging! he ended up gagging along. after that he was trying to recall the name of a show with dakota fanning in it and he was describing it to me with his eyes closed.
T: you know.. dakota fanning.. the alien show.. what's the title...
A: war of the worlds? what?
T: no no another one.. the mini series one..
A: umm... (starts to walk away from seat quietly.)
T: (blabbers on to empty seat in front of eyerybody)
A: (gagging)
Mom: where you going? (to agnes)
A: SSSHHHHHH!!! (all sorts of hand signals.)
T: *blah blah*... why so quiet? (opens eyes; embarrassed face; turns to me with smoke coming out of his ears.)

he spent the next minute whacking and scolding me. but it was worth it. AHA!

after a while we figured we should go see gran while waiting for tim's eyedrop thing to work. she was having dialysis so we went there and found jamie at her side. the only thing jamie understood all that while was that "... my girl, missy. my boy, taxi!" meaning my mom was a nurse and my uncle was a taxi driver. got action one, hilarious. jamie stayed with us for quite a while. then isa came after she left. gran recognized isa! =) spent time listening to her woes.. found out she has a painful lump on her right side.. around her chest area. waiting for docs to check out what in the world it is. also, docs told my mom that gran CANNOT GO FOR SURGERY because her heart won't take it. now the plan is heavy painkillers and therapy? i'm not sure. she'll probably stay for another week or so.

yesterday i was seriously going to go see gran but my mom told me to go home and SLEEP because i've been kinda worried and i didn't really get any sleep on friday and saturday nights. the back of my head felt like there were rocks weighing it down.. so, i gave it a pass. slpt for a longg time at home. feeling okay now.

dad went to visit gran, and is bringing ah mah along cause she wanted to go. i feel like going too.

pics!
waiting game.

abducted by aliens! this machine toughes your eyeball. ACK!

painful eyedrops.

yes, close your eyes.

his specs shrink the eyes. goodness, tim is prettier than me. TSKK!

gran and isa.

mom wiping her back.

mommy went to the hospital to talk to the doctor today about by gran. seems like she's gonna need surgery to get a bionic leg. (i'm not good at making medical things sound sensible, excuse me. ha~) so, it's not her hip that's fractured, it's her femur. (spelling?) i was quite surprised that there really was a fracture cause i figured if she could walk around for a few days with the injury it shouldn't be anything that serious, but what do you know, thus is the threshold of pain of an old woman who shuns the hospital. anyway, gran is alright other than the fact that she can't move around and she's afraid of operations. thanks for the thoughts and the prayers and the messages everyboday, we feel the love. <3

it seems sick week has not passed yet. (sad) this time it's granny. she fell at around 6 something AM on saturday. i was sleeping in the hall so i heard her fall. um, anyway long story short, she was in GRRREAT pain last night, at her left hip, so my parents carried her down in her wheelchair and sent her to SGH by cab. she must've looked so grand in her sedan-like chair. that was around 9pm. she got some xrays done amongst other tests, and then was warded. parents came home at 2+ AM. poor souls were exhausted, and mom didn't go to work today. they went to see her just now.

brain not really working. since that last sentence i've been sitting here for like, 10 mins staring into the screen. i shall go do something more constructive.

I AM RECOVEREDDDDDD! well, in the process, but i'm rejoicing exceedingly because my dear throat is pain freeee! i really appreciate and will take care of my good, healthy throat now. umm, i'm still coughing up phlegm-balls but that still beats throat boils, so, thank God people! it is good to be healthy.

woke up today and my dad told me to stay home instead of going to church cause i hardly slept during the night. both of us were coughing that itchy, unstoppable headache-causing cough the entire night through.. but i didn't really feel tired, so i decided to go. i told dad and mom not to go.. and daddy stumbled back into his bed mumbling, "... yah, i cannot make it one... * zzzzzzz *." haha. mommy was tired to cause daddy woke her up with his coughing. poor things..

was alright at church. i was well prepared with my jacket! had one nasty cough attack which made me listen to the sermon from behind the curtain, but i ended up dozing off while leaning on the notice board. (AIYOYOOOOH, tsk. embarrassingahhhh~) to everyone who passed by and laughed at me, i didn't do it purposely okay. blame it on the medicine. anyways, had to cancel meeting with sher. (i'm so sad about that..) came back for lunch. napped for very long and enjoyed my last day of lelexation before i gotta busy with school work tomorrow, NOOOOOOOOH!

thank you everybody, nice people, for your KIIIIND words of love. i think they helped me get better faster. positive energy lah, you know? (pfft)

jacob is in the jungles of tekong now, GAH ! jacob fighting!

happy belated birthday daphne! i hope you got my card.

AHJAH~

now daddy's down. pfft.. chain chain chainnnn~ chain of sick people! (the.. song.. nevermind.) got up at dunno what time today and found daddy zee-ing soundly. made breakfast for granny and me and cleaned up the house. i keep going to the mirror to see my throat-boils. (that's what i shall call them.) there's one on the right side of my poor throat that hurts the most, but generally i'm feeling better! now is the purging stage, where the yucky phlegm and other dead germs come out. yeah~

i hope i get totally well by sunday. i have really loud, uncontrollable cough spasms. can't imagine myself all nicely dressed and coughing and tearing like a mad person, tsk, no no cannot.

thanks for your cheers people! wah, it feels good to be loved. :D

went to the polyclinic today and waited for like forever (i know, that's just how it is there.). i didn't bounce back from my flu as i usually do within two or three days, but instead it got worse. maybe it's a sign of age. *gasps* anyway the main problem is my throat which is affecting my entire head. self-medicated for the past few days but it didn't work. there's pus in my throat, like, big boils or ulcers that HURT LIKE WHAT LAH, and i can't sleep because it's so painfullllll. so that affected my nose and ears and all, and my voice sounds really funny, like it's floating at the top of my head. (the nasallest of nasal.) AH this is the worst flu ever! pus in my throat leh, PUS! tim got a shock when he saw it. mom got mad when i told her i thought i had throat cancer. (haha. parents hate those jokes.) got my antibiotics and a whole bag of other meds, so wish me a quick recovery! for now i shall have to put up with the pain. :(

granny is singing. i haven't been bothered by her in the night lately because i've been CAMPING outside for the past week! it's so nice sleeping in the hall. so spacious compared to my wobbly loft bed.

I CAUGHT THE FLUUUUUUUUUUUU, noooooooooo! i feel horrible today. feel like there's a big wound in my throat and a medicine ball in my head. my nose is all clogged with grosse stuff too. yep, it's the flu.

gonna go eat now.

aw, roy carrying micah. she's a big bright baby with three little teeth now. she'll grow up with this karate bodyguard by her side. :)marc wearing roy's shoes. tsk, funny lah. they looked much more ridiculous in real life than in the pic. ha~

school school work work. aza!

tim and mom have been sick. tim caught the flu and has been resting since thursday, mom had bad migrane since thursday but only took friday MC. they're much better now though. :)

today i went for teens club all alonely. the lesson was KEEP THYSELF PURE. valuable lesson, hard lesson too. thank God for BJ who emphasizes these important principles, lesson after lesson, sin sanctification heart issues. it's true, everything begins in the heart. i think some of us make the mistake of conforming outwardly but still holding on to our own views. guess that's missing the point. anyways BJ touched a littttle on BGR here and there, so i think we were all paying closer attention than usual. hee..
went to chongpang for lunch with the alamons and kahyue, but KY da bao-ed home for her family. gave up on our planned ice kachang because we were too full. walked around and i bought some stuff for my cards.
choir today was so FUNNY (not normal) ! some of us were in the laughing mood. apparently my face makes people laugh. (tsk) haha~ i like choir to be like that. =)

geil i will pay you back for the IL tea tomorrow. remind me pls!

sewed a singlet for bran today! i'm bad at sewing because i wanna do it really fast so it's half torn already. partially because bran started chewing it in hate after i took it off of him. hah.

VBS! my class photo. i don't look like a teacher do i? :(

korean thirsty hippo.

*munch munch*

i love chocopie~

steamboat after shopping. daddy bought the induction heater thing cause it saves money. and it's safer.

this was on labor day! bunch of ninjas. or breakdancers.

while i was doing my school work today my mom saw an ad in the papers about becoming a language teacher for special needs kids. i remember aunty susan (sher's mom) telling me once that i could be a speech therapist. wonder why i've never really thought about studying that. taking it into serious consideration now. =) you could say i've been finding an alternative to studying art. somehow i just don't think that's all i'm meant to do, but that's just what i'm good at and what i reallly enjoy. this whole future, next-phase-of-life thing is pretty confusing and quite scary, but anyway, i'm just praying about it. everybody's kicking up a big fuss about my ambition and plans. some people believe in me and others are just blatantly skeptical (about whether i can make it academically and socially).

people's view of me can be really frustrating sometimes. they see me and treat me like a really swa ku person who "doesn't know what real life is like" and "is not well-rounded". yes, some people have said that to my face. got alot more remarks also lah.. too many to say. fortunately, unlike ALOT of other homeschoolers, i have decided not to feed the urge to prove myself, which is why when i get remarks like that i just smile. i don't have to prove myself cool or street-wise. that's kind of egoistic. haha. when i was youngER i did lah, must make myself look athletic (which is why i started the whole stupid muscle thing and now my arms are huge) and i must be very charismatic and i must talk with the teen twang and must do this and that. thank God lah, i grew up a little. :D i find it easier to be myself now, and i like having the good girl aura.

anyway, how'd i veer to such a weird subject? i'm considering studying something to do with special needs kids. :) that's all i originally wanted to say. heh.

my, like, 7th journal is finishing (pages) and i'm gonna get a new one. my journal very funny one.. it's like a multipurpose book. i write everything in it, study notes, daily thoughts, angry letters, sermon notes, art ideas, (dumb) poems, short stories, etc, so it's a super top secret book, cause it's basically my brain in ink on paper. but now i'm gonna compile all my poems in one book. maybe it'd be finished by the time i'm.. 80. or 90. HAH.

i'm saving up for korean lessons. KEE!